So I just have to let you in on what seems to be the theme of my life - if you can't be the best psycho-obsessive manic-depressive in your element (a full time job I might add) - one will be appointed for you at random. This weekend was no exception. I had never had to deal with this sort of gal before because usually it's me with the weird jealousy anger fits. However, since medication and common sense have been prevailing in my head for quite some time, I learned to get over crap like that. But it doesn't mean I am not going to point it out in someone else for my own sick amusement. So here is this weekend's fiasco:

As you know, I visited my pal Jeff this weekend for my Birthday. We had made these plans a month in advance and I was really looking forward to the good time in Atlanta I was sure to have. Now Jeff is a funny, easy going guy and is a good man to have around in any setting or party, so he is mighty popular around town. His phone was going off at all hours and for various reasons. But one gal seemed to be calling and e-mail-paging every hour on the hour. Jeff decided to temporarily ignore her - as he really wasn't planning to spend time with her this weekend - and she was supposed to be on a plane heading out of town. I cared less one way or the other - he is his own person free to call and do what he wants. But most of this deciding happened while we watched American Psycho (what foreshadowing) and he even mentioned "I should call her back - I think this is going to be important later on in the movie." For those that don't know, that last line is a phrase I love to use when dealing with crap in your life that doesn't seem important at the time but later on is pivotal in what happens next. Usually I say this when I know something bad is going to happen.

He figured that it was probably going to be standard social stuff, and decided to read it later. What a stupid mistake on our part. One phone call could have ended this entire ordeal. When I hooked up my laptop, I would log on and take up the phone line - the moment I went offline - the phone would ring almost instantly. Unless she is psychic I could just imagine her dialing till her fingers calloused and her whole face lighting up with an evil looking grin (though very normal to her I am sure) when she would get through.

There is a general rule at Jeff's house - and it goes for everyone including myself - you don't come in unannounced. You call first. If no one answers the phone - that's a pretty good indication that they're either not home, or they don't want to deal with anyone. There is a knock at the door - Jeff hoped it was FedEx or UPS - we both knew differently. We hadn't even gotten dressed yet and were still lounging around in our bathrobes making breakfast when she arrived. Jeff told me later that at that moment he felt like Greg Brady when he went to the ice cream parlor and both girls that he liked were there. I laughed my ass off at that one.

Now at this point I had no opinion of her whatsoever, I try not to judge people until I meet them and even though she was calling him this whole time - Jeff never indicated this was a bad thing. In fact, he hadn't even answered any of her pages - so for all we knew, this was an emergency. So although feeling a bit underdressed, I was happy to meet her. And we get along great. I even invite her to the party I was going to that evening. However, the underlying feeling of "please eat your breakfast and leave - we have other things on our agenda today" was in my head. All the while we are chatting, I am conversing with my mom and other pals about this awkward (but comical) situation and I even write a journal entry about it.

Sooooooooooo 2-1/2 hours later and me still in my bathrobe - she decides it's time to leave after we give some hints that we were going shopping (I wanted to use the hint of where we both go to his room and lock the door - but that would have been too subtle for this chick) - we mentioned that we were going to Target - another mistake. An hour and half later after we usher her out the door and get dressed to leave (BTW: at this time it's 5pm -all my plans of going to Little Five points to go clothes shopping are gone) we arrive at Target. Wanna guess who is there? Yes, she is there as if waiting on us. She has even brought a little guy friend with her to make it look less obvious. That worked well.

Jeff and I are flagged down by her driver as she is asking what time we were leaving for the party and when we should meet up and then she says she needs Goth clothes for her friend (Jeff's closet is overstuffed with leather, latex, and chains). Jeff, being the nice guy agrees. While Jeff and I were in the store - we realize how creepy all of this is and start to rethink our plans. I realize this girl isn't going to go away even after we lend her clothes so when we get back, Jeff calls her to let her know that our plans have changed and that we were just going to meet her at the club and forego the party. Screw the friend - everyone owns a black t-shirt and that would work fine at the club.

She proceeds to call from different places every fifteen minutes to see if we will pick up the phone. We don't. However, I had left a message at a friend's house and I was expecting a call in the next ten minutes. The phone rings and I pick it up - Wanna guess who it is? Yes, and she is totally floored that I answered the phone - and that Jeff isn't able to talk to her (he's in the bathroom at this point). I have essentially "cock blocked" her and though I am embarrassed to admit this - I giggle about it. We leave before we can see if that happens.

After checking the tires (thankfully intact) we make it to Jester Fred's party and then conveniently stay later at the party (had a fabulous time -thanx for asking:). When we get to his house - the page goes off. She continues to page until 6am. I think Jeff just turned off the pager after a while.

The next day her droppings are still around as I look at my mail and see that she has specifically signed up for live journal with the sole intention of posting in my journal. (thank you so much Stacie for pointing it out to her - don't think I won't return the favor ASAP). While I am flattered, I know how friendly she is going to be towards me, and I am not disappointed. She writes a cute little note (written after 3am and a ton of alcohol I'm sure) and in between the lines I figure out that she is jealous and that I have shot down her confidence level. I also see that she is now going to resort to name calling. Then she puts on a different head and comments again on my journal on another entry about how she was just calling to wish me a happy birthday - that's normal behavior, right? Her mood swing roller coaster must be quite a ride.

Although she tried (and I was very impressed with her manipulation skills - they rival mine - she is a very smart girl) she never did ruin my weekend or infiltrate herself into our plans except Saturday afternoon. I feel bad for her - I would never wish a jealousy mood on anyone - they feel horrible inside - I should know, I have had them and still get them at times. I just keep mine in check. I realize she is only nineteen - but sometimes you need to reassess a situation and realize when you are wanted and when you are making a fool of yourself.

Well, now that I have written all of this down, I feel tons better. I could even at this point attempt to sit down with her and chat again like we did on Saturday (it's not like we didn't have anything in common -smirk), but I think she has already decided that I am the evil element in her quest for Jeff and there really isn't anything I can do but watch the train wreck she is trying to cause and get out of the way.

Although I feel sorry for her, I worry for Jeff - I hope he doesn't find any bunnies boiling on his stove. :) LOL